Today i went for a hair cut with dina. Now our hair is exactly the same length! what's ironic was that she trimmed hers by 2 inches n mine was 1 inch but i had more hair on e floor after my cut than her! O_O

Chem was A'ok. ^^ actually finished everything! ^^ but im afraid of careless mistakes..

1 more paper to go! all e way! good luck to the world!

G.S.T = Give. support. thankful. then will feel GREAT, SUPER, TERIFFIC! lol. someone's wierd nick.

Im so stark fuming mad. Im so mad im shaking inside. Its queer because it's cold but it burns. Thats it. That's the last straw! ill go become a lawyer. Then i can protect my family. No longer shall we be twittering baboons, lost and indecisive, without alternatives not because we are inferior, rather because we were ill informed. You devise to steal away everything that has become precious to me. Ill become rich and famous, then one day, i'll know enough law to twist and wrap it around my finger to fight back and sue the pants off you.

But i'll need to study so damn hard.

You may take away our livelihood, take away our material comforts, strip away what defines a normal life, but as long as i live, you will never break my spirit. I say this with as much vehemence the day you chased us out of the most precious place in the whole wide world to me. I hate you. and i still do. Where is your sense of human compassion? Inhuman, scheming, money mongering inbecils. If i could iwould comdemn a plague of locusts upon you, not to eat any of your non-existant fields, but to drain your assets. The day of your demise will be the greatest day of my life.

I am staunch believer against the users of profanity. We are all civilised people. Why degrade yourself to the standard of a babarian when you rant and rave. Dont you know how foolish you look repeating the same word over and over again, that silly meaningless 4 lettered word, an act from which humans are one of the few species to engage in and derive pleasure from. How common and imbecillic you look, how you demote yourself by advertising flamboyantly how limited your vocabulary really is?

Let's let life be more colourful. When i scold, it will be so full of "flavour" that most of it will be beyond your understanding. But then, then, the only thing that will stand between you and the epitome of my hatred would be god's saving grace.

I dont get mad often. But when i do get mad, i dont just get mad. I MAKE SURE i get even.

Now, all i gotta do is everything that i am capable of. But being 18 and looking like you are still 14 means not much.

No, dont worry. I just need to rant and rave. MAD . Ill be ok.

Remember e times when....
You were all wet and silly looking..
So i toweled you down..
And you fell asleep in my hand?

Whenever i look at anything sleeping, this overwhelming desire to risk life and limb to protect it no matter what happens, come what may. Maybe its just coz whenever anyone or anything is asleep, theres this stark look of naked vunerability stamped all over their face. Oh ya. Thats provided that i know and actually like tt person as a person. I dont feel this kind of feeling to the blangadeshi sleeping at my voiddeck during the hot afternoon. lol. But i do get tt warm fuzzy feeling looking at e adorable kitties snooze. lol.

Now i understand why there's this general trend that the eldest child is the most well behaved and the youngest is the miscreant. Its not that parents go "awwww. how cute. The younger is cuter than the older one. Lets pamper him" Ok.. maybe thats the case for some.. I find that one tires of drilling discipline in their children after a while. Perhaps life would be easier if we would just "let it be" and not constantly harp and nag and pester. Bad move. Edward is a complete spoilt brat! one day tt little un will jump to his death i tell you! *choy! choy!* *touches wood* Im always catching him whenever he "falls" so he expects my hand to "magically appear" and catch him! argh! i used to train them not to jump off high places "i trained my tortoises last time. Taught them how to look down over sharp edges. So cute they were. But edward. Haiz. After a while you just tire of the training. Just let him be. haiz.

Todays weather was DAMN HOT. no need to waste money go suana. just spend time in school hall. dots.

2 more papers to go! ^^

Goodluck! jiayo all!

Chem wad BAD. and its not like im expecting to get grades within the range of A-D. Its really really bad. >_< omg.

So tired. Tmr the mother of all exams are gona come and smack us in the face. Phy in the morning then maths! ARGH. i really cant stand morning afternoon papers. Now im alredy so drained. how to tahan tmr?

Think id better go sleep now. Pray that i pass. haha.

Oh ya!

Today bro bought lunch 4 me! a million thanks! (coz i was too lazy to leave the house n he was too free me thinks. lol.)
-eternally grateful-
No wait. Eternity ends in

3

2

1

oh. its over le. haha. next time

just wana say

GOOD LUCK TO EVERYONE 4 EXAMS! ^^

Think im going blind these days. I can walk past ppl n dont see them. Today i met crystal and kahmun! ^^ separately tt is. But they had to like do sth to make themselves REALLY REALLY obvious to me like call my name (loudly) or wave (frantically?) Maybe i should wear my glasses permanently or sth..

Or mabe im too busy wandering around, lost in a dream that will never be realised.
Im sorry but the girl you think you know died a long time ago. Along with her heart.

I wanted to blog about sth really..

Different?

Awe inspiring?

Im just sick of doing minute mundane recordings of what i have done.
bla bla bla
It's not like anyone is interested in what i do day in day of for amusement right?


When does one come to the edge of the world?
Look over the gaping hole that is nothingness
And comtemplate on whether it is actually better on the other side?
What spurs them on
To actually have the guts to
Jump.
Am i a coward,
because i like many of my peers,
have not the courage to do so?

Sometimes i wonder if my facade will crack open.
Then you will see that im someone else inside
Its ok to pretend that you know me
Because the girl you assume to know
is but another of her long practiced conceptions
yet harbour no doubt, for
I smile, not because i agree
rather, What i wear,
Is the smile of indulgence

Thursday i watched sesame street. Found it so amusing! i really wanted to stick around 4 e whole show. but had to go out to buy lunch. so. haiz.

Cherish memories for when the moment passes, that is all you will have left.
Hopes are good coz they bring the promise of something better.



Do you believe in love at first sight?
Let me tell you a story...

Somewhere on the Nonce, is a tribe of winged creatures called the Fathathai. A gentle, shy people; almost like angels. There are very few of them on the island, because they dont find love easily, and so a Fathathai wedding is a rare event. But anyway, legent goes taht there was one of these creatures by the name of Numa Child, who did fall in love.

Lucky him

Well, yes and no. You see, he fell in love with a woman he met here on the monce, called Elathuria. She was, he thought, the most beautiful woman he had ever set eyes on. There was only one problem.

What was that?

She wasn't flesh and blood as he was

What was she?

As you know, this island is home to some very strange lifeforms. And Elathuria was one of these strangeness.
She was a plant.
You think im joking?

No..

Well, ivh learned only two things in my life. One, that love is the begining and end of all meaning. And two, that it is the same thing whatever shape our souls have taken on this journey. Love is love. Is love.

Ivh had no personal experience of this. But ivh read books. And all the great ones agree with you..
Please tell me there rest of the story..

Well, wehn Numa Child first met the Elathuria she was in full bloom. She was perfection. No other words for it.

Extraordinary

It gets stranger still, believe me. Did i tell you Numa child fell in love in a heartbeat? I mean, literally. It was that fast. He saw Elathuria, and that was it. his fate was sealed.

Love at first sight?
Absolutely
Do you believe in that?
Oh, certainly. It happened to me. The very moment i set yees on the princess Boa, i knew there was no other soul i could ever love. No other to the end of the hours

Well, to continue, So Numa Child told Elathuria instantly. "Lady," he said. "i will never love anyone the way i love you." and much to his surprise, Elathuria invited him to kiss her.
"Quickly," she said. "because the sun is hot and the hour is passing"
Numa didnt think very much about the significance of this. He was simply happy to be invited to kiss his beloved. And as they kissed and talked and kissed again, the hour of the Nonce ticked away..

This isnt going to end happily, is it?

When Numa Child kissed her again, there was a little bitterness on her lips.
"Whats happening?" He said to her.
She told him : "time is passing, my beloved."

And to his horror, he saw that her blossoms, which had been so bright and beautiful when he'd first set eyes on her, were now begining to lose that brightness, and her green leaves were begining to turn gold and brown"

Finally, she said to him: "Dont leave me, love. Promise me you'll never leave. Find me again, wherever i go. Find me."

Of course, Numa didnt understand what she was telling him. "What do you mean?" He asked her.
But it soon became clear. She was leaving him. The wind had risen, and it was shaking her, the way it would shake a tree, so that it's blossoms and leaves fall, and its beauty is carried away. That was what was happening to Elathuria. She was losing her very being, right in front of his eyes. It was terrible..

Elathuria was still strong enough to speak to Numa. "look for me wherever the wind comes" she said, her voice getting more and more hushed, "I will grow again from the seed that is carried away from this place."

Numa was, of course happy to hear this. But his mind was filled with questions and doubts.

"Will it really be you?" He said to her

"Yes,"She told him. "It will be me in every particularity. Except one."

"And what's that?" Numa asked her.

" I wont remember you." She replied.

Even as she spoke these words, a breath of harsh wind sprang up and shook her violently, so that she was entirely shaken apart --"

No! had she gone?
Well, yes and no..

The wind has scattered the seeds over a considerable distance, but Numa was determined to find soem trace of her --any trace-- so he searched like a wild man, not resting, until his search was rewarded.

At last, after a long time searching for her, he finally found her, rooted in a new place. She was still growing, but he knew her immediately, and fell in love with her again, just as he had the first time."

And she with him?
Yes of course
Even though she didnt remember him?
Yes. She was still the same soul, after all. And so was he....
So history repeated itself?

Indeed it did. Not once, but over and over and over. Though Numa Child swore his undying devotion to Elathuria, the hour would always pass, and the wind would always come, and she would be carried away to some new place. Sometimes he would find her quickly, sometimes not.

And so do you really think they are still out there, loving each other, and then being separated, and him finding her again, only to be separated again?
Yes i do..
What a terrible way to love...

Love makes it's demands, and you listen. You cant bargain with it. You cant fight it. Not if it's really love.

Are you still talking about Numa child and Elathuria?

Im talking about all lovers

Ah i see...



I dont know why but this story ahd some sort of impact on me.

Soul mates? Do i believe?

If i do then i am a fool, for i have met him and left him already.


Can you find me?

Ivh been tagged!


1. Do the following without complaints
2. Choose 5 people to do this after you completed yours
3. Leave a tag on the person's tagboard to say he/she have been tagged
4. Start your post with "I have been tagged!" then do this


Favourites
favourite colour: Yellow
favourite food: Sushi / tomato based pasta / watermellon / mango pudding
favourite song: John mayer's "83"
favourite movie: Cant think of any for the moment
favourite sport: Long distance Running / Pool
favourite day of the week: Friday
favourite season: Summer. i like e sun. n sunny days. never fails to lift spirits ^^
favourite ice-cream: Erm. actually i like ALL ice cream?

Currents
current mood: Bleah. xian of exams coming.
current taste: Aftertaste of Lychee moochi in my mouth
current clothes: Shirt N shorts
current deskstop: Still picture of my class from last year at Elaine's bbq!
current toenail: Filed, deep blue wanabe
current time: Tama says its 10.01.10 Is tama accurate?
current surroundings: Com room
current annoyances: My face itches...
current thoughts: Im SOOOOOOOOOOOO sick of studying! heck! i need a life other than studying! but are we supposed to have lives this year? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooo... *fade out*

First
first best friends: Amanda & Darrini (did i spell her name correctly?)
first crush: I cant remember his name! Some cute guy from K1 me thinks.
first movie: Erm. i think it was disney.
first lie: *gives wide eyed innocent look* "no mummy i didnt forget to off the lights. It came on by itself!"
first music: Carpenters. ^^ or tt cd of dad that i 'koped' from his collection that i still have. Think its called Tennessee walts- my favourite songs


Lasts
last cigarette: Erm. har? unless you count passive smoking? like some irritating ppl who have to smoke as they walk past you then im dying from the stench..
last drink: cant remember. =p last month?
last car ride: Friday
last crush: Does tt mean the previous one or the current one?
last movie: X-Men 3: The Last Stand
last phone call: Cant rmb. The phone rings so often its irritating.
last CD played: John mayer's heavier things


Have you ever have you ever dated your best friend: Over my dead body! Thats as good as courting suicide!
have you ever broken the law: Does chewing chewing gum and watching M18 movies while you are not 18 yet and going to pub while you are not 18 yet and sitting in cars where you are not the driver but the driver breaks the speed limit count?
have you ever been arrested: Me? do crime? *gives innocent look*
have you ever skinny-dipped: If theres no one but me n e fishies 4 sure. and def not in singapore where it's illegal!! Maybe in a hottub in japan.. Hmm.. Def w/o e guys!!
have you ever been on tv: Tt time mr ang superhost tt show we go support him i got caught on camera jumping around like a bunny. so embarassing.
have you ever kissed someone you don't know: Once upon a dream. I met him eventually.


5 things you are wearing: Hair clip, clothes, undergarments? I really dislike the hassle of having to accessorise.
4 things you done today: Study, watch tv, play with tama, disturb edward.
3 things you can hear right now: The tv, some irritating ppl trying to sing on karoke, the mrt train
1 thing you do when you are bored: sleep

I cant stand guys who dont know me and call me pretty. It's pretty obvious that you want me only for looks and not me for me so you can go back and stick your head into whateva pile of mud you just crawled out from. I esp cant stand guys who keep on saying tt im pretty and they are ugly so obviously i wont accept them. for gods sake, where is your self esteem? Hello? I mean its nice to hear sometimes as a compliment, but SOMETIMES only. Say it too often and it seems as if all you ever think about of me is me being a no more than a pretty face. I especially totally cant stand guys who make cat calls when a girl walks by. for gods sake, what age are we living in?? Cant you be more civilised or sth?

I have given up trying to reason with the source of all unreason. yeah i feel said some spiteful things but i feel bad. Did you?

What happened ystd i dont wana talk about it

I need you

If i had known that you needed me too on wed id have gone to see you for sure even though it was just for an hour. But i didnt know and i still dont know. Whether you needed me or not. All i can say is im sorry. Everyone needs a hug sometimes. All you had to do was to say that you needed me.

Mango pudding and strawberry shortcake

Today celebrated fathers day with dad at some chinese restaurant at chimes. bill was so ex. sobs. Enjoyed my favourite mango pudding desert after dinner then got nostalgic over reminicising childhood memories and stressing over how the standard of mango pudding has dropped over e years. The size seems to have diminished! or is it just tt i have grown bigger while it is e same size so it appears tt it has shrunk?

Mango pudding. my first childhood "love". e no 1 place in my heart. Mango pudding in my heart (stomach) 4 eva... lol..

Went INK just to socialise with e ppl. e ppl are so intersting! lol

Todays' fortune cookie says: you will fall in love soon.
I say: HA HA! AS IF!

17/6/06 friday
Watched silent hill with eunice, jackson and dina. so scaryy!!! quite good !! >_< but bad ending. not bad a watch. but then again, alot of ppl have been saying tt it's crappy. hmm.

It's like riverside gathering day! lol! just standing at the civics enterance of cwp and we met bihqing, meifeng and parry! going down escalator we met samuel ect! and at civics we met jason tan, alvin yeo and cedric chong! lol! interesting!

Met up with mf and parry over dinner. E 2 of em so cute 2gether lah! but good thing no eyeball dropping incidents! lol. Thank god 4 Mf. TT guy kept on calling then i dont dare to ans she help me to ans then say wrong no to him. Now im kinda paranoid whenever i walk around woodlands alone. Really scared tt im going to run into him then he will demand an explanation on why i gave him e "wrong no" scarryyy... -_-

17/6/06 Saturday
Eunice flies off to thailand today! godspeed! u lucky girl! must remember our souviners arh! :P

Couldnt sleep well last night. kept on having hallucinations accompanied by mind generated sounds of a heavy sword dragging across the ground. this silent hill thing is really gettting to me. -_-

Studying session with pa, bihqing, kenneth. Kenneth called his "friend" rachael, (corrected spelling by my bro, for my bro) whom we are all assuming to be my future sister in law. lol! ^^ She's quite a nice person and seems ok to get along with. ^^ but she said tt i look like sec 4! AHHHHH! *sobs* at least it's an improvement. at least she didnt tink tt i looked like a sec 2.

Kenneth has been going on with lameness. He came up with this
HOW TO BREAK A HEART
Stab the chest
Pry open the wound
Gorge the heart out
Snip off veins using a small blunt scissors
Put the heart into liquid Nitrogen
Throw it down a hundred floors
If it doesn't break, hammer it until it breaks
A broken heart is formed
Put it back to the body if you want to
What have i to say but. You dont need to do that. All it takes is a single word. Goodbye. Another variation or more acurately, 2 or three whether you consider one of the words to be 2 or one word in length.


I finally figured out the height deficiency thinge. Since i stopped growing at P6, (yeah. this is a well known yet uncommon fact about me tt i enjoy telling people to see their shocked expressions. It's so amusing! :p lol) people who dont know me well thought i was older than i acutally was. everytime also guess my age thought tt im in sec2. made me happy until i actually hit sec 2 then ppl think tt really in sec 2. Until i hit sec 3 then 4 then j1 & j2, PPL STILL THINK TT IM IN SEC 2! ahhhhh!!! *sobs*

Pa was badly down with a cold today. must drink lotsa water, eat your medicine, take care and get well soon kae! ^^

Guys, please let your heart do the talking for once instead of your pants
Curse the vile thing that people have dubbed as love
I swear upon my namesake that only in love that i will forego my passion of truely living, which i have come to a conclusion to as being that of trying as many new things in this life as possible before it ends, and that my next will be my last, i will not date anymore guys just coz he was "interestingly different"
Damn


You wish for medieval times of chivary, honor and valour. I am fey. I stick to my self dubbed namesake. As on of the fey, we prize loyalty, honour and valour in the face of death for the greater good above all, as this is what we strive to be yet cannot be, for we have no morals as we have no soul, you cannot trust us, for we cannot be bound, by anything but by iron and by oath of word. We can lie and cheat as we please, never trust the sayings of the fey. However, if we give our word in form of oath, we will never break it. In our world, we do not trade with cash, rather our world is worth it's weight in gold. Those of us who have lost our wings are intensely jealous, detest or even fear the other winged creatures.

Dang i think this name sake thing is going too far. I seem to have discovered some of the causes of my alergies. Metal. i wonder if there is iron in it.

Bored then decided to search 4 my namesake.

Word of the Day for Monday March 7, 2005
fey \FAY\, adjective:1. Possessing or displaying a strange and otherworldly aspect or quality; magical or fairylike; elfin.2. Having power to see into the future; visionary; clairvoyant.3. Appearing slightly crazy, as if under a spell; touched.4. (Scots.) Fated to die; doomed.5. (Scots.) Marked by a sense of approaching death. Fey comes from Middle English feye, feie, from Old English fæge, "fated to die."

http://www.steveberman.com/sofey.htm
They're immortal. They cannot lie. Often they are unnaturally beautiful or horrendously ugly. With a song or a glance or a single kiss they can bewitch. They are the Fey Folk. For centuries they have captivated us, in folktales and in fiction.

What kind of element fey are you? (PRETTY PICS)

You are the most rarest find. You are the shapeshifter. Have a bubbly personality? Thats what i thought. You shape from the Yeti to a fairy to a person of the mist to the person in my math class. You can have a temper and can be mislead easily.
Take this quiz!

AL-vin Means "elf friend" from the Old English name Ælfwine, which was formed of the elements ælf "elf" and wine "friend". (what?? my name sake has sth to do with him??)

Kimberlyn is a combination of the name kimberly and lynn. DUH.

Kimberly: From the name of a city in South Africa which was originally named for Lord Kimberley, whose surname means "land belonging to CYNEBURGA" in Old English

Cyneburga : Means "royal fortress" from Old English cyne "royal" and burg "fortress". Saint Cyneburga, a daughter of a king of Mercia, was the founder of an abbey in the 7th century.

Now a member of FeyRealm.com

Come on people! dont tell me you actually believe everything you read? sometimes im bored n decide to crap. lol.

Today i went for an interview at Takashimaya tower. It was interesting? I'm not sure whether to sign up or not. It is freelance. The decision is such a major headache. Alth the course is free, it will clash with my jc2 prelims. And then it lasts for 6 weeks, alth got 2 possible ponning sessions. And its on sunday at meritus mandrin hospital. i really duno if i should go or not. it seems like such a golden opportunity! it would be like a dream coz i can pursue my ideal lifestyle! ill be free lancing,then its not a full time job so i can pursue my manga artist dreams at e same time! It's so perfect! But.. i really rather then die than go alone.. but i dont wana force dina to go with me.. And theres lots of complications such as the money for equiptment tt will cost around $500.. Actually, the only thing holding me back is the time and the money problem.. but dina has got lotsa issues, Like parental consent, but hell yeah, im 18 already so i dont need any parental consent to do whateva i want. Then again stuff that she she isnt ok with are the stuff tt make me want this kind of job even more! argh! maybe im just a sucker for new experiences. It's just the same old brand new me. give me a new experience and i'll jump at the opportunity. If my boss changes every assignment, who cares! it just makes life more interesting! and widens my social circle. E problem with me is tt im just too touch n go. Never have been good at maintaining long term friendships. Mainly its been my friends tt helped in e maintainence, every now and then contacting me n stuff. But im just me and the me nearly everyone knows is tt i dont bother. sorry if i take like years to reply anyone's sms, but tt's just me. Cope with it or lose it. Thats why this kind of job is good for me.. and i really like meeting new people but ivh never been good at maintaining contact, recently becoming better at small talk.. I really dunoo!! ahhh!!

I find whenever i wear my brown, stripped, lacy at the neckline, spagetti, sleeveless shirt, i attract unwanted attention. all of undesirable age groups. The latest addition is this brown guy who is 20-40?, footballer, cyclist, rosewooder. Wonder if he heard my mainical cries of help to dina as he cycled away towards the highway. Seriously. When he was telling me tt i was gorgeous i wanted to die laughing. I just about had the time of my life contorting my face into one of the instatanously and hopelessly puzzled about why this guy is trying to ask for my number. One smooth talker man. One smooth talker. Maybe i should get another line so tt i can specially give a safe number to them than get harrassed on my main phone. Pray that he never calls. Help me pray that he never calls. *praying*

Should i join or not?????

-----------------Backdating---------------------

Heyy busy!!

11/6/06 sunday
2pm at golden mile tower #02-55 ink studio. Went 4 comic sketch party there. ^^ Interesting place though damn wulu. met intereting people. Thinking of going for bronze in comic studies so tt can become artist in e future? good thing tt "personal nightmare" about newspaper headlines about 2 girls kidnapped n .. didnt come true. lol.

12/6/06 Monday
Happy birthday andrew! My didi finally 18 le hor! *blows balloon* *pops balloon* *cheers madly* Went to watch x men with dina n andrew then we celebrated his birthday. after tt got to know andrew better n kenneth kanchiong wanted computer software chiong to woodlands so ended up seeing inside of andrews house. Damn was it messy.

13/6/06 Tuesday
Studying session with eunice and dina! libary so cold! >_< 1st time i ate lunch at cafe galilee! nice! read interesting articles from cleo! girls! listen up! DONT SLEEP FACE DOWN! scientifically proven tt it will deform your ahem ahem. oh ya! and soaking em in hot water will cause them to decolourise or sth! ahh! no more hot springs!

14/6/06
Today was class outing to sentosa! but only 9 ppl turned up! sobs! but still damn fun lah! ^^

Not myself - John Mayer

Suppose i said
I am on my best behavior
And there are times
i lose my worried mind

Would you want me when
I am not myself?
Wait it out when i am someone else?

Suppose i said that
Colours change for no good reason
And words will go from poetry to prose

Would you want me when i am not myself?
Wait it out when i am someone else?

And I, in time, will come around
I always do for you

Suppose I said
You're my saving grace?

~Just a song by john mayer i keep humming today. sorry kenneth if it was loud enough to be audible and grate on your nerves.

Who said asap? It's been nearly 2 weeks. Im still waiting. Please hurry before i lose myself.


Today mugged with kenneth at checkpoint! leaving home e time, baby bird took it's first flight! scared the poop out of it and the hell out of me! Literally! I forgot tama, left him at home (so sorry) but he didnt die! im so happy! i bought a whole TUB of fizy cola sweets! *SOB* (sob=state of bliss)

Ivh been discovering more and more simalarities of ncc guys. Its SCARY! They are all just so.. same!!


1) Very devoted to cca (duno y. national pride or sth?)
2) when bored, they tend to chew on things, usually parts of fingers
3) When waiting for ppl, they like to squat in strange, unlikely corners with this lost little boy look. (maybe sth to do with their training to disarm the enemy?)
4) They like to use the phrase "sth cork up"
5) They adore their NCC t-shirts. Always see em wearing their ncc shirts everywhere.
6) Most are obsessed with being body beautiful. Actually not obsessed but seem happy talking about exercising. Or is it just a guy thing?
7) They try to put on the "strong, silent type" of facade, alth some truely just cant hide who they are inside!
8) After all of those "report to HQ must have short hair" all seem very fascianted with the idea of having fringes as long as possible preferably touching nose, before NS shaves it all off.
9) Equipped with special ability to be able to fall asleep, anytime, anywhere, everywhere, esp after all that special training with the NO SLEEPING BAG rule


Actually got alot alot more, just cant remember what they are at this moment.
No, i dont have sth against ncc ppl. just blogging to remind myself about their uncanny similarities. Its scary! really!

Who am i to you anyway?

Who you'vh always wanted to be
someone to be sensible with
Someone to admire you
Good little girl
Your sucessor to your title
Filial daughter

You can draw meh? You can draw meh? Those words you said keep running through my head. I duno why but those words hurt the most. All my life ivh always been told "wah. u can draw leh." But. You actually asked me if i can draw. You, of all people, the one ivh always looked up to, the one i depend on for my self esteem, is unaware of this so called skill of mine. Now here i stand questioning my own abilities. Can i draw? Really? Are those lines i doodle on a piece of paper really a drawing or am i disillusioned by my own overconfidence in my abilities? My head so full of air that my feet no longer touch the ground? You said that denise can draw. She's going to Lascele, school of art. You said that she can really draw. I havent seen any of her recent her drawings. All i remember is stereotypical people with symmetrical round heads and rectangular bodies fleshed out in oil pastels. And i remember my curious yet cautious disdain for her unorignaility while i harboured a secret jealousy that she was allowed to pursue her passion in an after school art workshop while i was forced into routine, mundane everyday task of chinese tuition. Keep it all inside to myself. For eternity has the mantra been imbued into the very skin that i live in that "there is no future in the arts" Keep it all inside to myself.

Im starting to find that your questions fall into a routine. Its strange to ask people of movies when you dont watch any yourself. No im not faulting you on that issue, if you didnt ask me it would be strange. But at times it just gives me a cause to wonder.
Who actually knows me for me really? Who am i really? Sharp as a knife, grumpy as hell, Bitchy as i please, Blur Sleepy JC student, Gossipy, shopaholic, happy go lucky, little dreamer, Jap fanatic, Lost little girl, needy girlfriend, comforting friend, Headstrong enemy, Contented artist, backporch poet, lovesick musician, painfully quiet and shy student, outgoing and chirpy OGL, good natured anything person, which facade of me is real? Is any of it real at all? Who knows the real me for me?
Forever the backyard porch poet, with the book of rymes, always open, knowing all the time im probably, never going to find the perfect line
For heavier things


Today i went studying with kenneth at woodlands libary after going out with dad in e morning. Thanks bro 4 e "ans sheet" ^^ When we were leaving we saw a really sad sight. OMG, what is the world coming to?
A little girl stood staring at the fountain or water sprouting out of the black hole of nothingness. Her head was cocked to one side, as if she stood marvling at the mystical wonder of the origin of the water. Then she raised her foot, and stomped on the sprout of water, as if it was a pesky bug, stomping so hard with such great force as if it was a living thing that's lifesource she wanted to extinguish.
Kenneth laughed and pointed. "thats the new sort of dictatorship this worlds' gonna get. 'Go down! i command you to go down!' *laughs manically*"


Lotsa backdating. Ya i know it;s been long but ivh been REALLY REALLY REALLY busy

2/6/06 friday
Had chemistry lecture After tt went to dina's house with amy, mf, to stone until JCS camp.
At dina's house we all got assulted by meifeng. And i think everyone needed a good dose of superglue after tt. Meifeng, i tt nice to sit on meh? O_O
JCS camp was soooooo fun! but long story and hard to describe. Very very long story. ALl i can say is tt it was damn fun and more like a chalet than anything else! we played cards e whole night and listened to music and ate chips and drank soft drinks and celebrated yihao's birthday and did stupid forefits and played with sparklers and went to rooftop and kena sprayed by shunfa with his water gun and didnt sleep a wink all night....

3/6/06 sat
2nd day of jcs camp. We lay on e stadium and stared at e clouds. so nice. ^^ sushiboy is actually quite a nice person. alth he act quite gay sometimes and talk alot. But actually he's not bad lah. he actually cleaned up while everyone was out like a light! n he's a malaysian. not tt ttt = good or tt im biased against tt. haha. After tt we went for 3d animation course at bishan cc. Erm. BLUR. first 1 hour didnt understand anything. The lecturer was VERY NICE but his accent was VERY THICK didnt understand a thing he said + our sleepyness = gone case never learn. After tt change lecturer learn a bit. say worthwhile or not? quite lah. but not worth $40 me thinks. hmmm. After tt ate lunch at bishan foodcourt then went home.

4/6/06 sunday
Yesterday when i reached home i read finish midori days 3. Then i fell asleep. Thne i woke up to eat dinner. Then i fell asleep. Then i woke up to brush teeth. Then i went back to sleep. Then i woke up this morning to eat lunch. Then i fell asleep again. Then i woke up tor ead book at 6pm + then eat dinner. Then i went back to sleep until monday. God i feel like a pig.

5/6/06 monday
Had mock stats maths test today. i thought it started at 8.30. but i overslept so reached school at 8.55. Turns out tt e paper started at 8am & reporting time was at 7.45! OMGGGGG!! Then i enjoyed a lazy afternoon drawing and playing with edward and resurected cey and listened to john mayer over n over n over n over n over and over and over again and again and again....

6/6/06 tuesday
OMG! today is dooms day! or so called dooms day! Had physics lecture today. I was late (as usual) but ang was even later (as usual) so wasnt late at all! ^^ After tt went shopping at orchard with dina. explored whole of far east level 3. Omg it took us from 4+ to 8.30 pm to cover everything! Bought so many things im brokeee!! ahhh!! ~ shopaholic

7/6/06 wednesday
i had flag day this morning. ^^ its crazy lah! went for chem tutorial half way through! e whole flagdayers from our clz just disappeared 1/2 way to go 4 lessons at ijc. funny xia. we were asking 4 donations 4m our clzmates during lessons~! oh ya! a BIG THANK YOU and *HUG* for all e kind souls tt donated to me, esp those ppl tt i know! ^^ After tt met up with dina and we went shopping at CWP. Dina got her new specs! She kept on commenting on how clear the world suddenly was. funny xia!

8/6/06 thursday
Today supposed to have maths rememdial and chem rememdial tt clashed so ended up supposed to go 4 maths only but i had headache in e morning so theoretically i poned both lessons. Heard tt e pure maths mock test was a killer. After tt went with eunice, nisha and dina4 SHOPPING again at orchard! im an absolute shopaholic! great singapore sale rocks! but very sad coz we spent too much time eating, and deciding where to eat, tt we never buy any clothes at all coz when we started shopping, shops started closing! SAD! on e way home we ran into shunfa. interesting. lol. after tt 11pm had conference about our eastcoast outing tts upcoming. so exciting! nisha u movie holic! x men more impt than us hor? XP

Guess what? He's got a blog. Interesting fellow put on his MSN nick.

zhugekx.blogspot.com

After reading some stuff there. I feel damn bad lah. It's official. Nisha dont laugh. Now i ustd how badly i broke his heart when i broke up with him. Seriously any guys out there should just stay away from me. I swear to god that you will end up getting your heart broken too. Maybe it's just in my blood. Look at dad. He's had what? 3 wives? After how he treated mum, i (still young and foolish and naive at age 10, primary 4) swore vengence on e male species. Silly little me wanted to become a man hunter. lol. cross my path and live to regret it. I will not only break your heart into a million pieces, i will step on it then gloat over your foolishness after tt. And all in the name of feminism.

But what is the point of it all in the end? I feel terrible for what ivh done towards him. I want to scoop him up like a little boy he really is, hug him and take away his pain. Coz he will never really know that the truth is, he was the only guy i every honest to goodness ever really liked.

Ivh given up those ways. Sadly, i feel nothing for him. But truth is he's so interesting its fasinating. Gotta get back to being non-existent. Better for him and for me.


Girls out there. Dont follow me. If it's still possible let your first be your last. I never expected it to last so it didnt.


I have no right to advice my friends on affairs of e heart.


Im really terribly sorry.
This week i came to a conclusion.
Then i realised that it's true.
You really still havent forgiven me.
Im sorry.
But i know no matter how many times i apologise you still wont forgive me..

Today had physics lecture in e morning!
THE LECTURER DISILLUSIONED E WHOLE LT ON E MYSTERY OF SHOOTING STARS!
Turns out tt they are peices of floating garbage out in e grand outdoors of space which foolishly wandered too close to our earth's atmosphere and thus got burnt up and "fall". Silly romantics at heart like us choose to make a wish on these "shooting stars", which is actually just burning rubbish. sheesh.

After tt me & Jy went "shopping" at cwp. see so many sale signs! so tempting! think tt im getting "aunty" tendencies to want to scream madly whenever i see a 50%off sign in any shop window and push and shove e other aunties and "fight" over getting the best bargains. haha.

I FINALLY got my other JOHN MAYER cd! so happy!!! ^^ room for squres. could just listen to him sing e whole day. this is e 5th time im repeating his cd already. haha. Great lyrics, great guitars, great vocals, what more could i ask 4? ^^ *state of bliss*

Did so much drawing today! *elevated state of bliss*

Oh no! chem test tmr i havent studied yet! too busy drawing! >_< (and listening to and singing along to john mayer. Lyrics are so catchy lah! ^^ Just read this!
"I wana run through the halls of my high school
i wana scream at the top of my lungs
i just found out there's no such thing as
THE REAL WORLD
just a lie u got to rise above"

And this is my current fav ^^

"I'vh these dreams im walking home
Home when it used to be
And everything is as wit was
Frozen infront of me

Here i stand 6 feet small
Romanticizing years ago
It's a bitter sweet feeling hearing
"wrapped around your finger" on the radio

And those days i wish i was 6 again
Oh make me a red cape
i wana be superman

Oh if only my life was more like the 1983
All these things would be more like they
were at the start of me
Had it made in 83

Thinking about my brother ben
I miss him everyday
He looks just like his older brother Johm
But on an 18 month delay

Here i stand 6 feelt small
And smiling coz im scared as hell
KInd of like my lfie is a sequel to a movie
Where the actor's names have changed
oh well

Well these days
I wish i was 6 again
Oh make me a red cape
I wana be superman

Oh if only my life was more like the 1983
All these things would be more like
they were at the start of me

If my life was more than 1983
Id plot a course to the source of
The purest little part of me

And most my memories
Have escaped me
Or confused themselveswithd reams
If heaven's all we want it to be
Send your prayers to me care of 1983

You can paint that house a rainbow fo colours
Rip out the floorboards
Replace the shutters But that's my plastic in the dirt
Whatever happened to my lunchbox
When came the day that it got
Thrown away and dont you think i should
Have had some say in that decsion" )

Think i like it losts coz i too wana too go back to when i was 6. Dress me up in green i wana be peter pan. but it's back in 1994? I think about My neighbours (some really close ones- never had any sibilings. some were like family to me.) i do miss em. best part was amanda. I was born on 16th april, she 17/19/21th april(oh no memory is geting screwed). It was like so ment to be. Now im 5feet2 tall and i do smile when im scared as hell. The more scared i get the more polite and the brighter my smile gets. Id love to go back n see tt prue part of me? where timoki and tandad was still alive, where every day was bright and sunny and spent at the playground or splashing around in e pool with my neighbours? Now a days memories seem really strange too. When i think back upon it, i wonder if its real or a dream. Or did i dream of that incident before it happened or is did it even happen at all? And of coz i remember my lunch box! i had one too and my mum didnt ask 4 my consent! she thew it away and got another one for me which she thought was better! i still remember e HUGE fuss i kicked up back then! it was MY lunch box u know! i think it was e only lunchbox she let me choose myself one! haha./


Yesterday spent e whole aftn slacking and drawing and listening to John mayer's "heavier things" over and over again until i told myself better get another cd of his before it gets burnt from overheating in the cd player. haha.

After tt met nisha, jackson, dina for dinner at pastamania. GUESS WHAT? NISHA IS MY MUMMY! ^^ mummy! are u reading this? mummy mummy mummy! ^^ (mummy naughty hor! pa like tarzan let u see everything le! orh hor! *shakes finger*) Joking joking! ahh! dun use the alien vs predator floorball stick to wack me! ahh! scary!

Eunice joined us later on to watch over e hedge. Me n dina got lost staring at e SALE signs then wandered into e shops. haha. >_< sorry for disappering so long ystd! sale signs too tempting le!

Over e hedge damn funny lahhh!! OMGGG!! it''s indescriably funny! must watch~! funny!!!!! the potato chip so power!!! miniature nuclearr bomb! especially the energy drink! squirrell powerful xiaa!!! and DONT LEAVE E MOVIE EARLY! WAIT UNTIL CREDITS FINISH! this show like X-men 3! at e end still got shot left!

Shadole! im getting blisters!! actually no lah.. just slightly cracked skin. >_< scary to look at. haiz. how?

When i said "hammy" to dina, i suddenly got this sick feeling in my stomach. yeah. edward is really cute and everything. But i just realised how much i miss that little furball. There's really no replacement for the first one. Even now i still miss timoki and tandad. Haiz. Timoki especially.

Russ! dun everytime so down! smile! ^^


Backdating:


----saturday---
Went for prize ppt at NTU 4 e ink competion. E standard very high! and biased! they biased against pencil works! just coz e name ink! they only say drawing must be B&W, how we know? haiz.

After tt we went food fest, looked at the MPH bookstore sale(so cheap! i brought 2 books! one $5 and e other $8/6?) After tt went the cheap bargain shop? i got a new pencil case for $2.90! happy! but dina n shunfa quite sad coz they saw some of their stuff at very cheap price. (Dina her purple bag. SHunfa his sweater) very funny coz dina tryinng to comfort shunfa by talking about bringing down overall price by buying e same thing then she saw her thing also then both very heart pain. haah. Jcs new president is nice! ^^ After tt we went eat japanese pizza at oishi! interesting day & experience!

---Sunday---
Celebrated MF bdae at dina;'s pool until we got chased away coz no eating at e pool side! so sad lahz! after tt went to play sparklers 4 a bit then go home. Happy belated b'dae meifeng! ^^